Chimney Tops ..take one.

The Smoky Mountains! If heaven could manifest on Earth, this is where it would happen! Swear!

I'm a Georgia girl - born, bred, and raised a Dawg. But Tennessee is where the heart's at! From the mountains to the Southern atmosphere, this is where I choose to be - always. If there's an opportunity for that to happen, I'm on it! Hands down. No questions asked. 

This weekend, Jonathan, Mandi and I ventured up to take a stab at the "Chimney Tops" trail. It was fun - it really was! But we did quite a few things wrong, which just means we'll have to do it again to get it right!

For starters, I worked two days before this adventure took place. Now remember I'm not only a nurse, but a critical care nurse. We're busy, lives depend on us, and there are rarely any breaks. So after two-three days, I'm exhausted, dehydrated, and in dire need of sleep. We also didn't prepare food and clothes until the night before (remember I didn't get home until well after 9 to start with). It was after 11 before we climbed into bed and we left home at 6. 

I was tired. dehydrated. and already out of shape.

I knew the hike would be strenuous - many people had said that online. What they failed to mention is that the entire two mile hike is completely, 100% uphill. No pauses. About a quarter into the hike, I began to feel funny - like my head hurt, and my head felt funny, and I began to get nauseous. This only progressed as we climbed. We made it about 3/4th up and I just couldn't go any further. I felt defeated, sick, and like I had let the team down. 

While the hike was unsuccessful, the three of us did have a good time. We saw amazing mountain-top views and finished out the day with brilliantly cooked apple fritters!

4.11.15
Great Smoky Mountains.

Until Next Time Chimney Tops,

V

Easter 2015.

Happy Easter, y'all!

Easter 2015
Hickory Grove Baptist Church
4.5.15

This morning, I had the great pleasure of listening to one of my oldest and dearest childhood friends preach. He preached of how unashamed Jesus was went he allowed men to beat Him, torture Him, mock Him, and nail Him to the cross to die. He wasn't ashamed of me. Let's repeat for emphasis, He was NOT ashamed of ME, Victoria Lynn White. Instead He allowed Himself to be kill and then won victory over death, for ME! 

Now let's think a little bit. How many times in my life have I kept my mouth shut because I didn't want to be embarrassed, or teased, or socially shunned because of my beliefs? I'm ashamed to say that the number is exponentially high. And if we'll all be honest, this is how we all behave from time to time. It's easy to say you're a Christian when you're sitting on a church pew. It's easy to declare you're a Christian when a religious holiday pops up. It's easy to stand up for our Savior when something goes right.
But.
What about those times when you're the only believer in the room? What about those moments when you're caught in the middle of a valley and people start to ask where your God is? What about those moments when you seem all alone and nothing is going as it should?

I'm here to tell you friends, even in those situations, God is still God! He is mighty and worthy to be praised! Better yet, even in those situations, He wouldn't have been ashamed of YOU! He wouldn't have been ashamed of ME! And even when we feel like He should just walk away because we've done X, Y, and probably Z .. He never leaves. He holds our hand. He holds us safely in His arms. He protects us. He never gives up on us! Why then, is it so hard for us to do this very same thing in return?

I urge each of you to take this to heart, to converse with God, to stand up for God, to allow others to know what He's doing and done for you, to work for a deeper relationship with God! After all, He's already done so much for each of us.

Peace and Love Y'all,

V

Let's catch up, shall we?!

Happy Spring, darlings! Can y'all believe it's already springtime?! 2015 is 25% gone ...already! And I hope you all are well on your way to making this year the best to date! Many have asked of my whereabouts the past few weeks, and to answer the questions broadly, I've been living. 

I accepted a position last year with Emory Healthcare and began this adventure mid-February. There have most definitely been some challenges to overcome as I embrace my new professional role, but I'm getting back into the rhythm and am slowly developing my own style of nursing. I'm very grateful and appreciative of the opportunity to "come into my own" with nurses that I already know and trust. I couldn't imagine doing this in a new environment and with new people; my anxiety just couldn't handle it!

HGBC youth group also adventured to the Ringling Brothers and Barnum & Bailey Circus in late February. Many of the younger children were able to participate and their excitement was priceless. Thurston's favorite part was the motorcycles, Alena loved the elephants, Wyatt talked about the lions for days and my mama loved the acrobats.

I've had a wonderful few months! I've done things I never thought I would've had the courage and strength to do before. Some things turned out well and others ..well, not so much. But for the first time in a my twenty-three years, I feel free! I feel I can do whatever I want, for as long as I want, whenever I want. Now, obviously there are limits. I have a job that comes with a schedule. I also don't have millions of dollars in savings and my salary isn't so impressive. But, I still feel in charge of myself and in control of who I am, where my life is going, and the people involved in it. 

Cheers, to living life!
V

Reynold's Nature Preserve

Happy Valentines Day, y'all!

It's been a passion of mine for quite some time now to get into hiking and trail walking. I love the mountains (no surprise there!) and the views from the top are spectacular. However, I'm out of shape and overweight (again, no surprises there) and have a lot of anxiety about my abilities to make it up the side of a mountain or down waterfalls. But. You cannot get anywhere without trying, or worse, never starting.

So today, on the day that is all about passions and love, I started. Nothing major, obviously, because A) it's freezing and B) I only had a few hours. But, I went and wandered around and loved every single minute about it.

Reynold's Nature Preserve

The trails are about 45 minutes from my apartment and honestly, I wouldn't drive it to walk these trails all the time. Today I wanted a trip of some sort, to get out of my apartment, and to just ..go. As I mentioned earlier, I'm really overweight and out of shape, but I found these trails to be extremely easy. The outer perimeter trail is about 1.5 miles and the two inner trails about 1 mile each. There's a couple very slight inclines, but nothing really crazy unless you're trail running. I'm sure the park is gorgeous in the spring, summer, and fall, but everything is ridiculously barren right now due to the time of year.

The trails are well maintained and easy to walk. However, the trails aren't clearly marked and I managed to get lost a few times. The park was relaxing though and very much needed for my own sanity. The cold air was exhilarating! I'm most definitely not a city girl, and I need more dirt in my life.

Peace and Love Y'all,

V

Y'all! I'm a RN!

75 questions.

50 minutes.

2 days feeling like the world would surely end.

but.

I PASSED, y'all!!

Victoria White, MSN, RN ..that's one hell of a ring!

The NCLEX was extremely difficult; much harder than I expected. The weird part is that the questions themselves weren't particularly hard. The answer choices, however, were difficult; none of the choices were blatently wrong or right. I was able to narrow down most of the questions to two choices and from there, an educated guess followed. I only knew that I had answered about five questions right and I was certain, beyond certain, I had failed.

To make matters worse, I learned that Pearson Vue has a "trick" to find out if you had passed early. Allegedly, if you passed the test, it wouldn't allow you to register and pay to take the exam again. In pure desperation, I attempted this trick the day I took the exam. And it failed. And then I cried. In 48 hours, I was able to purchase my results early and learned that I passed! I had never felt so relieved in all my life!

Stages of NCLEX - before the exam, after, and Once I found out I passed!

I'd like to personally thank every single person that said a prayer in my name. They were definitely heard and greatly appreciated. I'm so excited to be starting this next chapter of my life and moving on to the future that's before me! I want adventure, and excitement, and all the feels that is this beautiful life. I want to see the world, experience greatness, and live fearlessly.

Dear life, I'm coming for you!

Peace and Love Y'all,

V

Twas the night before the NCLEX

Twas the night before the NCLEX .. and I'm a hot mess!

To say I'm nervous would be an understatement. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, the mere fact that everything I've ever worked toward comes down to passing this one exam is extremely nerve wracking and the cause of great panic.

I'm confident in what I know. I know how to prioritize patients. I know how to delegate. I know how to safely care for emergent situations. These things, I know!
I'm not so confident in my knowledge of medications. I can usually pick out side effects and things to monitor based on patient's diagnosis, but general knowledge, no go! I'm uncertain of mother/baby material. I feel I know enough to get by if something went wrong, but this is definitely not my specialty.

With all of this said, I'm nervous. I'm scared that I didn't study enough, worried that I didn't retain enough information during school, and anxious about the possibility of losing my job if I don't pass.

I'm not so sure my nerves can handle all this! Prayers would greatly be appreciated!

Peace and Love Y'all,

V

Well Hello There February

Um… Well, Goodbye January. 

Is it just me, or did the year just start yesterday? This is terribly insane and I'm embarrassed to say that I've accomplished diddly-squat over the past 31 days. Actually, that's not entirely true. While I haven't done as much as I promised or began some things I wanted, all my needs have been met. 

At the first of the year, a very short and fast 31 days ago, I made seven goals for 2015 (post). At the close of each month, my plan is revisit these seven goals - give an update or lack thereof, give important and life changing details, etc.

Get close to God.
Since 2012, God and I have been on the rocks. I was so angry with God that I didn't want anything to do with Him or church or anything else really. In retrospect, it's funny that this was my mindset because He is legit the only one who could have and eventually did save me - from my grief, from my sorrow, and ultimately from myself. 2014 was a year like no other. I saw things and experienced things that changed my life and perspective. 2014 was the year I came crawling back to God. 2014 was the year I knew I needed Him. 2015, however, is the year I want to get to know Him. I was saved at a young age and I believe without one shadow of doubt that God saved my soul on March 30, 2003. No doubt - see ya in heaven! But in the almost thirteen years since that I night, I've never truly studied His word, learned His desires for my life, or took the time to just talk with Him. Shame on me! This man died for me and I can't even "check in" once a day! This year, I'm bound and determined to change that by reading the Bible each day and praying more. It doesn't seem like a lot, but A) we all have to start somewhere and B) it has actually been quite challenging.
This month, I've managed to pray more than I have in a long time. Could I pray more? Absolutely! But I'm happy with the progress I've made. I've also read each day - some days more than others, but the point is, I'm doing it! Effort leads to progress and perseverance leads to habits.

Be patient. Trust God and His timing. Put faith in His hands that things will work out.
This has been extremely more challenging that I had originally thought. I'm a huge control-freak, which isn't something that can just be shut off. I've found myself questioning and doubting God's presence in my life. I'm trying, and will continue to try, but I'm not sure I'm getting anywhere.

Daily acts of kindness. Forgive quickly.
Forgiveness is something I struggle with more than I like to admit. Blame it on my controlling nature if you must, but I can hold a grudge like no other. It's most definitely a problem. I'm gaining some ground, or at least I think I am. The next step will be not acting like I'm still mad, i.e. communication!
Acts of kindness are going well. This month, a majority of these went to my mama - driving her around, reading menus for her, helping her plan church activities, etc. We've grown a lot closer this month and I love it!

Live simply.
This is something I've striving to be. I make less trips to the store and more "bulk" shopping trips. Planning is something I'm still working on.

Stress less.
…

Make healthier choices.
When I made this goal, I didn't intend for it to refer to clean eating or healthier food choices. While those are important, I definitely haven't reached any of those. This was about making better emotional decisions. Letting negative people out of my life. Not hanging onto people because I was lonely or felt I needed them. This was about living my life the way I wanted with the people I wanted in it - the people who make me smile and laugh continuously, the people who think about my feelings before making decisions, the people that include me.
So far, I've cut a lot of people out of my life. I let go of an ex-boyfriend ..and didn't go back. I went on a first date, and didn't call for a second. I'm more independent than I've felt in a long time. I feel more like me than I have since 2012. Let's all take a moment to praise God for that one!!

Write every day.
I honestly didn't think this would be a goal that I would struggle with, but it has proven to be that in my life. I write a lot. I doodle. I sing crazy lyrics no one will ever hear. I blog. I journal. But everyday? Not a chance. With the stress and time that has gone into NCLEX prep, writing has fallen to the wayside. I hope that once this terrible test is over, I'll have more time to dedicate to this goal. 
Maybe even try out this NaNoWriMo thing this spring? Ey, we'll see. (:

There we have it - the trials and triumphs of January 2015. February will consist of the NCLEX, a big girl job, and lots of new adventures. Bring it!

Cheers y'all,

V

NCLEX Prep ..Park Edition.

"For He shall give His angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways."

Psalms 91:11

In order to become a licensed registered nurse (RN), each nursing school graduate must pass the NCLEX (basically, nursing boards). The NCLEX has brought me and my nursing friends much anxiety over the past couple years, and much more since graduation in December. For the majority of my class, jobs have been applied for and accepted on the basis that this exam is passed. And for me, knowing that everything I've worked toward my whole life rests on this ONE exam is quite terrifying!! 

My test was originally scheduled for January 17th. I was a nervous wreck! I couldn't eat. I couldn't sleep. I was nauseous. I vomited  …a lot. I had so many panic attacks that week, I literally thought I was going to die.

But.

Then God stepped in. Doesn't He always show up? 

The Friday before my test, I was looking up an address for my testing center so I could make my test drive. Turns out, I never received confirmation of my testing date and the date/time I thought I had scheduled wasn't saved!! At first, I was angry - it was something else that didn't go "right" in nursing school, another obstacle to overcome, and another thing to "fix". Once the anger faded and reason came into play, rescheduling wasn't an issue at all. 

My new testing date is February 4th - a whole two and a half weeks later. Praise God!!

Today, just one week before this test, nerves are beginning to sick in again. However, they are lessened by about 100%. I feel a smidge more confident and I don't feel rushed. I'm sure this will increase as the next week drags on, but whatever the outcome, I have faith I'll be taken care of and protected.

NCLEX prep, though, is serious business. 100-200 questions a day PLUS review material, my brain feels like mush. And the thought of sitting in my apartment studying all day for the third day in a row seems like a good motive to jump off the patio! So in order to preserve what little sanity I have left and save my precious little life, studying commenced at the park today. There's this super small place my grandma use to take me every week when I was little to do my homework before my violin lesson. I'm not sure why this place popped into my head, but it was there when I woke up - and after the events of today, I know God lead me exactly where I needed to be. I packed my bag, stopped for an early lunch, and headed on over. I found a picnic table that was slightly secluded and covered, but still had lots of sunshine! I pulled out my books and began my routine. After about two hours, a lady and her daughter passed by me. She noticed the ten million NCLEX-RN books spread out and began to talk to me. She told me of how she's an RN, her experience with the NCLEX, to hide good luck charms in my bra because they'll seize everything, and that I would do just fine. She talked to me about where I'd be working, where she works, and places to look into once my contract with Emory is over. 

Now, everyone and their mama has told me I'd do well on this test. But my problem with this is that they don't really know. For example, my mama has all the faith in the world in me and tells me all the time not to worry because I'm gonna pass. I love that she thinks that! I do, I do. But, she's doesn't really know if I can pass it, because she doesn't really know what's on the NCLEX, how it works, or the statistics of it. The same logic goes for my pops, my brother, best friends, etc. This lady though, she talked to me about how to fix problems I was having and things to look for in each question. She, after knowing all my problem areas and having real-life experience and not knowing me from Adam, believes that I'm gonna be okay. And that is comforting!

Everyone just believes I'm the smartest person and has the greatest of faith in me - and it's scary. I know that's a stupid thing to be scared of - too many people think I'm awesome and that's a problem! It is though. I care entirely too much what people think of me and if I don't pass this test, not only do I let myself down, but I disappoint everyone else too. My family has pinned all the hopes and dreams of a future on me and I don't want to fail them. Oh, the struggles of worrying about everyone else.

Prayers are greatly appreciated!

NCLEX Prep @ Grayson Park

Peace and Love,

V

Wolf Ridge Ski Lodge 2015

It's that time of year again, folks! Ski Season!! (:

I say that as if I've actually been brave enough to attempt hitting the slopes. I'm terribly sorry to disappoint, but that would be a big, fat negative. You know, something about tumbling down a mountain of ice and snow just doesn't seem appealing to me. Disclaimer: I will eventually try it ..like maybe next year when I can't get kicked out of school, fall behind in school, or lose my job offer.

The past few years, I've tagged along with my brother and his boy scout troop on their annual ski trip. This year, however, I was able to share this experience with my whole family and our church youth group. Due to financial reasons, we weren't able to spend the whole weekend, but the day trip was a lot of fun anyway! After all, the Bible teaches us to be content with what we have (Hebrews 13:5).

The day started entirely too early; 4am to be exact. By the time we reached Mars Hill, NC, there was snow everywhere and it was snowing pretty hard if you ask this Georgia Belle!! It was so pretty though. Anyone who knows anything about me knows I'm absolutely crazy about the mountains and cows - and they were everywhere. It's gorgeous up there, y'all.

Wolf Ridge Ski Lodge @ Mars Hill, NC
1.24.15

Hickory Grove Baptist Church Youth Ski Trip
Mars Hill, NC
1.24.15

Road Trip to NC
1.24.15

The folks seemed to have had a blast skiing ..or attempting to ski. We were incredibly blessed to have this opportunity to fellowship together, to have a great time together, and to all make it home in one piece.

Peace and Love,

V

Y'all didn't think I forgot the selfies, did ya?!

Hello 2015! It's Very Nice to Meet You.

With the new year upon us, folks everywhere are taking it upon themselves to make resolutions for their lives. I suppose this is completely and perfectly okay ..for them. 

I, however, have never been a believer in resolutions. The word itself means the solving of a problem, and I don't believe we are problems. I believe we have problems, just as we have trials and tribulations. But we, the human population, are not problems. How can we, therefore, make resolutions? By making this one simple act, we admit that we are a problem and to not be a problem we must *insert resolution here*. Moreover, how can we decide to just be a different person on January 1 at 12:01a than we were December 31 at 11:59p. In my very own and very humble opinion, it doesn't make sense!

I do believe that people are full of ambitions. Ambitions to be healthier, thinner, smarter, etc etc etc. I know, I know! Ambitions sound a lot like resolutions! But they're not; this is the key. Resolutions are made to solve problems. Ambitions are no more than unidentified goals. Goals are things we can work toward to better ourselves, to improve our lives, but they do not solve problems. They improve our lives.

With all of this said and after much prayer, here are my GOALS for 2015.

1. Get close to God (James 4:8 "Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded.")
2. Be patient. Trust God and His timing. Put faith in His hand that things will work out (Isaiah 40:31 "But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.")
3. Daily acts of kindness. Forgive quickly. (Ephesian 4:32 "And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.")
4. Live simply. Life isn't about how many things you have, it's about the people standing next to you when you hit a road block. (Hebrews 13:5 "Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.")
5. Stress less (Philippians 4:6 "Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.")
6. Make healthier life choices (1 Corinthians 6:19-20 "What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's.")
7. Write every day - blog, journal, write songs/poems, write a book, etc

And there we have it! 2014 was definitely one for the books, but bigger and better things are coming. I can feel it in my bones y'all.

Now, for a brief recap of 2014!

Peace and Love Y'all,

V